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Wednesday, May 11, 2016

The New York Times Beclowns Itself Most Spectacularly!

"What We Can Learn From Donald Trump’s Unreleased Tax Returns"

You can't make this stuff up! "What can be learned from unknown information." Hmmmm okay I'll play ... Trump is actually Obama's real father and furthermore the actual conception occurred on board a pirate ship off the coast of Somalia. Well...lacking contrary information it could have happened that way...

A New York Times writer named Justin Wolfers has constructed a one-thousand word article on the topic of absolutely nothing at all! In a way you have to be impressed. So, your high-school English teacher has an assignment for you...write a one-thousand word paper on what can be learned from Santa Clause's unreleased "Naughty List." Now you don't have the list of course, but you can infer that because such a list might exist that if there were one and if you had access to it, you would perhaps assume—although of course we can't know or even in fact hazard a guess—that there might be people you know personally who could be listed on such a naughty list. Furthermore we could anticipate the possible revelation of all sorts of sordidly salacious sinful behavior from assorted known acquaintances who might well have dirty deeds detailed on this directory of dastardly dark doings. You could then having imagined the people and the deeds then construct a thousand word compendium of contemptible contemplation and crass conjecture. But to imagine, that such a dim-witted totally imagined fantasy essay would somehow find itself included in the so-called "paper of record," boggles every sane mind in creation itself.

The New York Times article spends paragraph after paragraph asking what perhaps a hypothetical Mr. X might do if he was Mother Teresa, or what he might do if he were average Joe and finally what he might do if he was the next in line to assume the unhuly mantle of the Anti-Christ himself. If you're curious I've linked the article below in the money making quote. In truth you see, you don't even have to read the entire convoluted asininely risible and absurd chain of "logic." You only have to read the paragraph that ends with:
Follow this logic, and you’re left to infer that the only person who won’t voluntarily release their tax returns must have the most to hide. It doesn’t just say that Mr. Trump has more to hide than Mrs. Clinton; it says that he has more to hide than any other candidate you could imagine.
No Justin, what is says, is that you're an imbecile and you've been punked more thoroughly than any punk ever got punked in the history of jailhouse punkings. Congratulations! He doesn't release his tax returns because he doesn't have to. In addition, once we see the Obama Birth Certificate, the Obama report cards, the your Obama redacted hidden thing from Benghazi to private servers to fast and furious to the IRS scandal to Project Destabilize the Mideast to Abandon Iraq to Operation Apologize to everyone to ...

Trump won't tell you something. That must upset you Justin Wolfers. Can you imagine it? A politician refuses to tell you what you want to know. Well, there's something that America wants to know. We've been asking this question for eight years now. Where have you been? Now you have questions? Now you want to know a candidate's history? Now, all of a sudden, it's important to find out all the facts about a potential President? Where were you in 2008? Where were you in 2012. Where were you Justin?

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